Goodbye Marlboro Man

Goodbye Marlboro Man.  My being with you wasn’t my best experience in life and I hope not to meet you again.

As much as I want to keep it to myself and prevent myself from bragging, I could no longer help but make it known that I have stopped – as in totally ceased – from SMOKING.  Yeah, for exactly 3 weeks now my pair of lungs has been free from the dangers of tobacco.  Exactly 3 weeks now I have not lighted a single cigarette.  And luckily, exactly 3 weeks now I have not craved for even a single puff.

Don’t get me wrong but I am not a chain smoker.  Though I have been smoking for the past 20 years whose only apparent reason for lighting cigarettes is because of my high-flying zaniness, I actually consider myself a “sosyal” (social) smoker.

my vaping gadget courtesy of Bautina

my vaping gadget courtesy of Bautina

The kicking-off of my smoking habit was actually not planned.  It was not a new year’s resolution for I believe New Year promises are actually made to be broken.  It was a simple unexpected circumstance.  Thanks to my younger sister Joy (I call her Bautina) for gifting me a special gadget for Christmas, i.e., an electronic vaporizer otherwise known as e-cigarette.

I started with a tiny container of e-juice with high nicotine content.  Now I’m on my second vial that has medium content of nicotine (6 mg).  Upon finishing this, my third vial is ready to vaporize with zero nicotine content.  All provided for free by my sweet sister Bautina.

Surprisingly, I have yet to experience the symptoms of withdrawal and have yet to feel what the terrifying cold turkey would be like.  I am glad that I just simply feel better.  I am free from the trappings that come with it — no more coughing, no more gasping for air, no more choking-stench of breath and fingers.  And more importantly, I will no longer have to cringe at the thought of my being impolite for being the lone smoker in a group of non-smokers.

To those who happen to bumped upon this article, congratulate me!  I can proudly say that this silent personal holocaust is over.

Nakaw!!! Pano na yan?! Lalong mas magiging malinamnam na ako nito ngayon?!

My Wish for the Year 2013? Spell It!

money scrabblePeople need money.  But for me, I don’t just need money because what I want is MORE MONEY!   People need money to survive and live a normal life.  Money allows us to buy what we want and what we need.  It is indeed not the guarantee to make people happy but let us face the fact that it is one potent medium that gives us vicarious pleasure.

Some even say that it is the root of all evil.  But let us also confront the truth that it bridges the gap for us to have roof over our head, food on the table, clean water, electricity, gas, transportation and even medicine when we are under the weather.  And if used properly it could enhance other’s lives through donations, charities and poverty alleviation.  Therefore having loads of money can be a powerful catalyst to spread the… spell it! L. O. V. E.

I know a lot of happy people who gets along fine without money.  But I don’t want to be like them.  I want to be happy and at the same time own truckloads of money.  I guess there’s nothing wrong with wanting the good things in your life.  Don’t get me wrong because I intend to earn, have and own money in a virtuous manner.  No way will I be a crook.  And I know I’m smarter than the devil so I won’t sell my soul just to have it.

I don’t know how much money I need.  But one thing is for sure I want mountains and mountains of it.  I want money running out of my butt.  I want money wafting out of my ears.  I want money growing out from my pimples.  Call me greedy, call me insane but I want to be a money magnet.

I guess now you know what my absurd yet practical wish for this New Year… spell it! M. O. N. E. Y. and more of it.

Oo na. Mababaw na kung mababaw. Pero aym shur… gusto mo rin nyan!

Toot toot! Happy New Year!!!

Happy New Year!!!

Cheers to another year of awesomeness!

me blowing a 5-year old trumpet

me blowing a 5-year old trumpet

One interesting anecdote that can be derived from the photo above is the torotot (party horn).  It’s a five-year-old bugle which Nengkoy brings out annually from her precious storage chest.  It’s the same bunch of paper trumpets that me and my relatives would use to welcome the New Year.  These hooters are only replaced when it is deemed damaged, pauperized or no longer toots and tootles when blown.

As I’ve observed from the malls recently, today’s party horns are modernized.  It’s made of hard colorful plastic and need not be blown using the strength of your breath.  It is simply pumped by both hands to produce a honking sound.  Also, modern horns seem to have a different sound.  It sounds more like the vuvuzela of South Africa used during the 2010 World Cup.

But Nengkoy’s horns still sounds the classic New Year paper-made trumpets.  Because the mouthpiece that produce the tooting sound (attached inside the nozzle) when I checked is still made of a piece of small hallow bamboo.  Last night, when I sampled the horns, the first thing I uttered was, “Tunog sinauna” (It sounds old and ancient).

Me and my family do not light up fire crackers (like what others would habitually do) to drive away the bad chi of the coming year.  Maybe my family is too clever to play with the dangers of lighting fire crackers and rather smartly chose to be in the safe zone.  Instead, we would usher the welcoming of the New Year by blasting confetti cannons and of course by blowing Nengkoy’s carton-made party horns.

After the New Year revelry, Nengkoy would simply collect all these trumpets, test each if it is still working and store it again in her storage box for next year’s celebration.  Next year for sure I will be blowing the same old yet reliable party horns.

Tut tut! Hapi Nyu Yir!!! 

Thank You Lou & Greg

the oreo-cookie-look-alike mayan calendar

I would like to personally thank two people who were responsible for the calendar that the world is now using.  Aloysius Lilius, the Italian astronomer and physicist who invented the solar-cycle-based Gregorian calendar and Pope Gregory XIII who approved on this calendar that bears his name.

It’s been all around the news for the past months that according to the Mayan calendar, tomorrow will be the end of the world.  Can you just imagine what we are now doing in case the Mayan calendar is the one that proliferated around this planet and the one we earthlings are using?  Today must probably be nothing but chaos.

Thanks Lou and Greg.  Because of you two, I’m not packing my bags and ready to go to either Venus or Mars since the world will not end tomorrow.  Nevertheless, December 21, 2012 will be dubbed as the most widely-disseminated doomsday tale of human history.

Tuloy ang buhay. May pasok bukas!

Chinese New Year & The Three Signs I Encountered

Tonight everyone in this planet will welcome and celebrate the Chinese New Year.  But according to Chinese Feng Sui, glories of the previous year will wane for those who are born in the Year of the Dog.  It is believed that Dogs have a number of afflictions to deal with this year.

I am born in the Year of the Dog and I will not just let and allow this ancient belief to be taken lightly.  So to protect and prevent myself from these upcoming hardships, I have carried out a couple of things that the Feng Sui masters have advised.

my 7-year-old pi yao (left) and my new pi yao (right) bracelets

Though I already have a Jade Pi Yao Bracelet, which I purchased in Hong Kong back in 2005, today I purchased another Pi Yao Bracelet.  This time it’s the Yellow Jasper type which I plan to wear all throughout this Year of the Dragon.  I plan to interchange the new one with my old as days passed by.  According to the ancient Feng Sui, I being a Dog is in direct conflict with Tai Sui, the ruling god of 2012.  Therefore, to appease and prevent me from clashing with the Grand Duke Jupiter (Tai Sui) I need to wear this Pi Yao Bracelet.

Moreover, according to Feng Sui not so inviting winds are headed towards those who were born in the Year of the Dog.  To impede this from happening according to Feng Sui, I need to carry with me at all times a Water Blue Rhinoceros keychain.  Along with the bracelet I bought the said keychain and immediately attached it to my keys!  Also, I purchased a Blue Elephant and Rhinoceros amulet and hanged it at the Northwest section of my unit.  To fully supplement this protection, my cellphone’s wallpaper now is a downloaded Blue Elephant & Rhinoceros keychain photo.

blue elephant & rhinoceros (hanged in the northwest section of my unit)

blue rhinoceros in my key chain

my cellphone's new wallpaper

What seems to be amazing with these trinkets that I just purchased is that it seems to be instantly taking its positive effect.  As soon as the short ceremony was done by the salesperson who sold me these items – placing the items in a brass bowl, hitting the bowl with a wooden pestle, asking me to place my hands to cover the bowl and wish 3 things, salesperson praying over and blowing onto the bowl – and brought these trinkets with me, I instantly seem to encounter positive occurrences.

On my way home, everyone who walks out of the mall where I purchased the trinkets were in a hurry.  There was a massive number of people waiting and hailing for a cab.  But as soon as I crossed the street and hailed one, the cab just stopped in front of me and let me it.  I say to myself that this could be a good sign.

While inside the taxi, the cab driver was suddenly signaled by a traffic enforcer to stop to give way to a long Chinese Street Parade.  I and the driver watched patiently enjoying the vibrant procession of colorful Dragon and Lion dances along with marching majorettes twirling their brightly colored flags.  Ironic as it may seem but I never felt the edginess and irritation of having to wait for the parade to finish.  I just sat inside the cab, watch the parade and thought to myself that the colorful procession may be a sign of good luck and a successful year.

Surprisingly, even though the parade has not fully passed by, the driver was able to maneuver his car and found a narrow alleyway to make a detour without crossing the parade to lead us and drive me back to my place of stay.  While riding the taxi on a detour, I thought to myself that the heavens must have conspired and this could be another good sign of positive things ahead this year.

When the taxi reached the building where I live, I paid him my fee and greet him Kung Hei Fat Choi while I get off his cab.  I entered the building and then rode the elevator to bring me to the floor of my unit.  I rode the elevator with a young girl who noticed my new bracelet and the green shirt I was wearing.  She uttered, “You’re wearing green! That’s a lucky color, the color of money.  I will wear green later tonight for the Chinese New Year.”  Then the elevator stopped and opened its doors for her to get off.  She greeted me Kung Hei Fat Choi with a smile while she gets out of the lift.  I smiled back and thought that this must be the third and last sign that the New Year ahead will be satisfyingly good…

Pero ika ng ng bruhildang Zenaida Seva tuwing umaga… “Hindi hawak ng mga bituin ang ating mga kapalaran.  Gabay lamang sila.  Meron tayong pri wil, gamitin natin ito.” Hmp!

Happy Fruity New Year!

Nothing will be missed, nothing will be gone.  So in keeping with the Pinoy tradition of hoping and wishing for good luck and prosperous New Year, I have filled two humungous containers with varieties of sweet round fruits.

Let me also take this great opportunity to thank all the sweet-fruity-like people who provided me joy in the year 2011 may it be like a tiny cherry in shape or the titanic watermelon in structure.  A heartfelt thanks to all people who kept me company in chasing butterflies and harvesting the crops of my existence, you made me further appreciate the rainbows of life.  You have been the fresh grapes, apples and mangoes of my being.

And for those who’ve been like rotten fruits who gave me a sting in the neck this year, let me pronounce that I forgive you and I’m wishing you not to carry out the most evil thing that you would do on the coming fresh year that would result to a karmic debt that you will be repaying and re-harvesting for the rest of your life.

In 2012 we for sure will encounter noble failures – that’s the bitter part of life – but let’s turn and plant these mishaps to bear creative golden orange-like opportunities.  Let’s all keep dreaming and try to achieve it with a smile.  Happy New Year everyone!!!

Hwag kayong mag-alala, tulad ng prut salad, masarap pa rin ako neks yir!

Sana Umulan ng Pera

me, nengkoy & 3 of my monster pamangkins

Last December 31 and January 1, a lot of people received lesser number of text messages as compared to same dates of previous years.  Sending a greeting via wall post on Facebook is more inexpensive and of course reached wider coverage.

Since everyone wished the classic peace, love and harmony among mankind this coming new year, I decided to be more practical in terms of my wish and greeting to everybody.  And since I own an extremely crazy blog, let me post the New Year greeting I sent via text message last December 31…

“Sana’y yumaman tayo at umulan ng pera sa taong 2011.

Happy New Year!!! “

I acknowledge that money is the root of all evil.  But I also recognize the glaring fact that having money is one important aspect to live a more normal, more secured and happier life this year and the years to come.  It pays the bills, it buys you stuff and it saves the future!  You cannot live in love alone.  Love doesn’t feed you, it usually gives you indigestion.  Blame it on the butterflies in your stomach. Mwahahaha! (laughing ala Ursula the Sea Witch)

To all those who greeted me through text message, Facebook or any other form or medium… a big hug, a wet kiss and warm thanks to all of you!

Sino ayaw ng pera? Aber!