The Tsunami Walk

I noticed for the past few days Shamcey Supsup, the reigning Ms. Philippines-Universe 2011 is constantly among the top trending name/topic in Yahoo Philippines.  This prompted me to seek out how did Shamcey performed in Brazil during the pageant’s preliminary run.

I was surprised to learn that the charming Filipina is considered a top contender for the crown.  She is absolutely stunning!  In almost all Brazilian news features that discusses about the upcoming Ms. Universe pageant, Shamcey seem always included.  I suppose this may signify that she is one of the favorites and may actually be the lady to beat.  So much so, the beautiful and now elegant Shamcey actually possess a unique way of walking, now tagged as The Tsunami Walk.

Those swaying hips can actually create waves of mass destruction!

The Tsunami Walk is an elegant way of gaiting with unique swaying of the hips that result to distinctive poise, bearing and attitude, in which, in the upcoming Ms. Universe pageant, only Shamcey Supsup can deliver.

If Shamcey Supsup lands the title of Ms. Universe 2011 – which I predict is very likely to happen – I won’t be surprised if upcoming patimpalak ng kagandahan (beauty pageants) during town or barrio fiestas participated by pretty ladies or Bekinese speaking population of the land will strut ala The Tsunami Walk.

Para kang SM Shamcey… “Yu gat it ol!” 

Zombadings

Almost all Filipino blogs has released an article or two about the movie Zombadings 1: Patayin Sa Shokot si Remington (Zombadings 1: Kill Remington By Fear).  Let this blog join the happy bandwagon and let me give my two cents on it.

Almost all blogs says that it is hilariously funny and smartly written and executed.  I totally agree with all of it.  I always adore Filipino camp movies.  And Zombadings is one classic that is comparable to the level of campiness achieved in the likes of Temptation Island and Secrets of Pura.

However, majority of the articles written about the movie is their failure to acknowledge the birth and emergence of a new and unique local pop vernacular different from the recorded dialects in the Philippines which I think was taken into great consideration in the movie.  The Bekimon dialect. Awaaard!!! 

Anyway, this is the only movie where you can find an insane-looking gaydar; a serial killer; a widow in roller blades; homosexual animals; a lunatic policewoman; the morphing of a hunk to an effeminate eve; and of course, gay zombies.  All combined and mixed up to create a coherent hilarious movie.

All in all Zombadings is undoubtedly heaps of fun.  But if those who watched it would contemplate deeper amidst the laughter and entertainment that the movie brought, it is actually a piece about empowerment; it is a deposition on embracing your own personal choice; and at the same time giving a big hard punch towards society’s intolerance and narrow-mindedness.

May puso ang istorya at ang hindi matawa sa pelikulang ito, bato.

Filipino is the Language of the Advantaged

After reading the full text and while we are in the midst of all rants and negative reactions from the recent article written by James Soriano (entitled Language, Leaning, Identity, Privilege) published in Manila Bulletin website, the first thought that entered my mind is that childish Soriano has yet to experience the advantage of speaking a unique language.

I think Soriano will only appreciate the Filipino language not by just reading the classic and one of the masterpieces of Philippine literature entitled Florante at Laura or by merely listening to the Filipino language calisthenics of Fliptop (the modern day Balagtasan in rap form) but by going out to tour another country with a fellow Filipino.

Filipino language can be a great tool for safety if you are out of the country.  One specific case in point is when I and a fellow Pinoy went to Morocco.  We planned to walk and tour the labyrinthine medina in Fez but when we arrived at the gate of the walled city, we felt a sense of danger of being mobbed.  I and my friend spoke in Filipino so that no Morrocan can understand what would be our immediate plan so as to be safe.  Still in Morocco, when we ride a jampacked train we would speak in Filipino to remind each other to mind our belongings from pick pockets.  In this way, we can continuously enjoy our journey by staying safe and cautious without the locals ever knowing that we are suspicious of some of the locals behind or in front of us.

When you are on tour out of the country, Filipino language can be a mode to blurt out over the top emotions of anger when the situation calls for it just to steam out your feelings without offending a local.  When me and my family went to Guangzhou China (as part of our Hong Kong tour package), the tourist guide led us to one of the bargain shopping malls.  In one of the electronic stores, I tried to haggle with a store attendant to lower down the price of a memory card.  The sales representative was a pain in the neck with his demeanor.  I did not buy the memory card and before I stepped out of his store, I shook his hand, smiled at him and told him “Gago Ka!”  The sales attendant was smiling at me when I left his store.

At the other end of the spectrum, Filipino language can be a mode to steam out your uncontrollable infatuation without embarrassing yourself towards a local without this people ever knowing that you are ablaze with their looks.  When I and a friend went to Blue Mountains in New South Wales, Australia we need to take a bus ride from the town of Katoomba.  As we get up the bus, my friend noticed that the Caucasian bus driver was strikingly good looking.  We sat on the available seats just behind the driver.  While the bus is running, my friend could no longer contain her scrutiny about the bus driver and told me, “Grabe HR and gwapo ng nagmamaneho.”  With her usual comical and mischievous nature she told me in her normal sounding voice, “Siguro pinkish ang titi nyan!”  We laugh out loud throughout the bus ride without the driver and other passengers knowing what we were talking about.

Now for Mr. Soriano, one piece of advice, get out of the country with a Filipino fellow and enjoy, realize and appreciate the advantages of speaking Filipino.  You will surely use your pandiwa, pang-uri, pang-abay, pantangi and panghalip.

Kasi naman… Nagmamagaling… Di naman kagalingan…

Quezon, Tagalog & Panggala-talk: A Linggo ng Wika Special

Today is the birthday of the guy whose face is on the twenty peso bill.  He is the same dude who is responsible why the female populace of this country can exercise their right to suffrage.  But his most popular feat and contribution in this country is his decision and declaration of making Filipino language the official and national language of the Philippines during the time when the two official languages of the country were English and Spanish.  He is Manuel L. Quezon, the father of this country’s national language.

This week, the country commemorates Linggo ng Wika (Filipino Language Week) which ends and culminates on Quezon’s birthday.  My earliest memory of me commemorating Linggo Ng Wika was during my grade school days.  I along with a bunch of classmates was summoned by our teacher to present a poem in an acrostic form during the Linggo Ng Wika program in our school.  If my memory serves me right, I was assigned to flash and state the verse that starts with letter N which was cut out from a red colored art-paper glued on a cardboard.

There are 175 dialects in the Philippines but the official Filipino language is based from the Tagalog language.  I being born and raised in the political and economic center of the country can speak, write and understand Tagalog.  In spite of this, Filipino is the school subject that caused me not to be included in the honor roll during high school because I garnered a grade of 79% during the third grading period in my 3rd year in high school. I must admit, Filipino is such a tricky thorny language.

Yet still, there is one dialect that I regret to have not learned.  It is the native tongue of my father – Panggalatok, the spoken dialect in the beautiful province of Pangasinan.    The only phrase I know in Panggalatok is “mangan tila!” which means “let’s eat!”  This is the common call I usually hear from my Panggalatok aunts and uncles every time they get to spend a day in our house in Pasay.

So today being the of peak of Linggo ng Wika, let me digress from Tagalog but instead give homage to the equally unique and exquisite Panggalatok dialect through this video which features one of the most admired classic songs in Pangasinan (which for sure my late father knows so well)…

Ang Tagalog ng “Noted By” ay “Nota Ni”

Pinoys Moving Gaga

It is so amazing to know that the most powerful woman in the world can easily be moved by the Filipinos.  Lady Gaga in 2009 during one of her first arena solo concert (in 2009 she would go on tour to sing and dance as an opening act for somebody more popular to follow).  Obviously, she was moved with the warm reception she received and even announced during the concert that she grew up in New York with a best friend from the Philippines.

Early this year, as everybody knows, YouTube sensation Maria Aragon (a Canadian with Filipino descent) impressed Lady Gaga with her rendition of Born This Way.  Aragon even had the chance to perform in Gaga’s concert in Canada.

Just this week, another Filipino moved Lady Gaga to tears with his contemporary dance rendition of a Sonya Tayeh choreography in the TV show So You Think You Can Dance.  Marko Germar, the Filipino contender based in Guam is the guy responsible for making Lady Gaga gone gaga.

I won’t post the goose-bump-popping rendition here (you can check it out on You Tube) but instead place my personal favorite dance routine of this amazing Pinoy with his partner Melanie Moore.  Marko and Melanie have done fabulous and chilling numbers in the show week after week, but this is my favorite!

I hope this deserving guy wins the contest.  I’m a fan!

Nagagaga ang gaga sa atin!

Sink Your Teeth on Apol Mabini’s Decalogue

Today is Independence Day in the Philippines.  It’s the day we Pinoys commemorate the day when total autonomy, liberty and freedom of our country against foreign rule was declared.  It is also one of those days of the year when Pinoys would discuss on who should be the country’s National Hero.  Some recognize that it is Rizal, some agrees that it is Bonifacio, some opines that it is Aguinaldo while others rant that it is the father of Kris Aquino.

But today let me personally mark my respect to one of the understudied men responsible in providing me freedom.  He is Apolinario Mabini, the guy whose name was adopted by a popular singing Pinoy trio two or three decades ago.

A lot of people including myself have high regard to people with soaring intelligence.  Apolinario Mabini is one of those few Pinoy personalities.  I like this dude because he lived a humble life and his existence were not laced with issues and controversies of motives of self interest (like that of Bonifacio, Aguinaldo, Aquino and even Rizal).

Today being Pinas’ Independence Day let me allow everyone who stumbled upon this write-up to sink his or her teeth onto Manong Apol’s genius writing entitled The True Decalogue.

First. Thou shalt love God and thy honor above all things: God as the fountain of all truth, of all justice and of all activity; and thy honor, the only power which will oblige thee to be faithful, just and industrious.

Second. Thou shalt worship God in the form which thy conscience may deem most righteous and worthy: for in thy conscience, which condemns thy evil deeds and praises thy good ones, speaks thy God.

Third. Thou shalt cultivate the special gifts which God has granted thee, working and studying according to thy ability never leaving the path of righteousness and justice, in order to attain thy own perfection, by means whereof thou shalt contribute to the progress of humanity; thus; thou shalt fulfill the mission to which God has appointed thee in this life and by so doing, thou shalt be honored, and being honored, thou shalt glorify thy God.

Fourth. Thou shalt love thy country after God and thy honor and more then thyself: for she is the only Paradise which God has given thee in this life, the only patrimony of thy race, the only inheritance of thy ancestors and the only hoe of thy posterity; because of her, thou hast life, love and interests, happiness, honor and God.

Fifth. Thou shalt strive for the happiness of thy country before thy own, making of her the kingdom of reason, of justice and of labor: for if she be happy, thou, together with thy family, shalt likewise be happy.

Sixth. Thou shalt strive for the independence of thy country: for only thou const have any real interest in her advancement and exaltation, because her independence constitutes thy own liberty; her advancement, thy perfection; and her exaltation, thy own glory and immortality.

Seventh. Thou shalt not recognize in thy country the authority of any person who has not been elected by thee and thy countrymen; for authority emanates from God, and as God speaks in the conscience of every man, the person designated and proclaimed by the conscience of a whole people is the only one who can use true authority.

Eighth. Thou shalt strive for a Republic and never for a monarchy in thy country: for the latter exalts one or several families and founds a dynasty; the former makes a people noble and worthy through reason, great through liberty, and prosperous and brilliant through labor.

Ninth. Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself: for God has imposed upon him, as well as upon thee, the obligation to help thee and not to do unto thee what he would not have thee do unto him; but if thy neighbor, failing in this sacred duty, attempt against thy life, thy liberty and thy interests, then thou shalt destroy and annihilate him for the supreme law of self-preservation prevails.

Tenth. Thou shalt consider thy countryman more than thy neighbor; thou shalt see him thy friend, thy brother or at least thy comrade, with whom thou art bound by one fate, by the same joys and sorrows and by common aspirations and interests.

Therefore, as long as national frontiers subsist, raised and maintained by the selfishness of race and of family, with thy countryman alone shalt thou unite in a perfect solidarity of purpose and interest, in order to have force, not only to resist the common enemy but also to attain all the aims of human life.

This masterpiece is so significant and is substantially applicable up to this date.  It seems that this composition is breathing and has a life of its own.  I hope that this is discussed to all young students of this present “free and independent” generation.

No wonder, American General Arthur McArthur (not Douglas) is so impressed with this dude, that he acknowledged him as a true Malay genius with views that are far more comprehensive than any other living Pinoy of his time.  I’m pretty sure if Mabini is living today, he would have been one damn great blogger!

Ipapalow ko din ang Tweets nya kung nagkataon!

Idiotic Anti-RH Bill Supporter

Piolo Pascual (Negkoy's favorite)

Dear Legions of Anti-RH Bill Citizens of the Land,

I am with you.  I am writing you this letter to express my full support on your advocacy that the enactment of “Responsible Parenthood, Reproductive Health and Population and Development Act of 2011” otherwise known as RH Bill into law here in the Philippines should not be carried out.

After reading the whole content of the proposed bill, I realized that the guidelines will somehow control and slow down the growth of the country’s population.  The country is already densely populated and I’m sure you still want full increase in its inhabitants.

If this bill is passed into law, it will educate the populace about their choices on how to have the right number of people either via natural proper spacing of childbirth in the family or via contraception which will eventually slows down the great escalation of population

If population growth slows down, there will be fewer people to share on the already depleted natural resources of this country.  Of course, we don’t want that to happen, we hate natural resources!

If population growth slows down, it will result to planting of more trees at the available spaces of the land instead of building concrete residential subdivisions or squatter areas inhabited by the poor citizens of this country.  We want a concrete filthy jungle not a lush green environment.  Of course we don’t want that to happen, we hate trees!

If population growth slows down, it will result to lesser number of students per classroom.  Lesser number students per classroom will mean more focused learnings among the youth.  Lesser number of students in the classroom will discourage cheating among students during exams.  Of course we don’t want that to happen, we hate being too focused and being too intelligent!

If population growth slows down, it will result to lesser number of people queuing at the not so reliable MRT and LRT train stations.  Also, during the congested train ride, we want our faces digging into the stinky armpits of other passengers.  Thus, there will be lesser stink of body sweat in the metro.  Of course we don’t want that to happen, we love the asim smell of pawis!

If population growth slows down, it will result to lesser number of church goers and eventually lead to decreased monetary donations and stipend for our loving priests.  Even if the priests themselves do not procreate and the number one violator of their teaching that people should go forth and multiply, we exalt them.  Of course we don’t want that to happen, we so love the filthy rich priests of this land!

If population growth slows down, it will result to lesser number of Facebook users which will eventually lead to lesser number of Facebook connected friends. Of course we don’t want that to happen, we love Facebook!

Your Friend in Disaster,

Neil

Ayaw ko ng RH Bill na ‘yan kasi BALIW ako!

Shhh… Patay Ang Diyos!

nengkoy's shhh

I am from Manila, probably the loudest city in the world.  But today is a totally different Manila.  It’s freaking quiet!  There literally are no cars on the streets, no ear splitting karaoke buzz emanating from households, the malls are closed and everybody is out of town.  Manila today is a dead zone.

For me, the most horrific day of the year is Good Friday.  It is scarier that Halloween and most horrendous than a Physics exam at school or a day you need to pay for household bills.  It is so petrifying because today is the day God died.

This fear has been inculcated in my moronic brain since childhood.  Since childhood as a tradition, today is the day that we couldn’t make noise before 3:00 PM because God is in misery and we couldn’t make noise after 3:00 PM because God is dead.

It is a common and ancient convention in our family’s compound in Pasay that we would receive fierce looks from the elders (starting with Lola Teray and Lola Anghiling) and say “Shhh! Patay ang Diyos!”, if you happen to have been the cause of any sound or noise.

This was fossilized into my deepest subconscious that up to this point, I made sure to zip my luscious lips all throughout the day.  This also made me terrified that if God is dead, then it connotes that evil spirits and other loathsome creatures wanders the entire planet lurking in the aparador or lying in wait sa ilalim ng kama (under the bed) ready to suck your blood or devour on little children.

Now that I am grown up, what really solidifies my red and while corpuscles is that horrifying monsters need not wait for Good Friday anymore.  They ramble and scramble the earth every single day and need not manifest in those horrible appearances like fangs, horns and tails with leathery wings on a bad hair day.  Today they wear ordinary clothing like that of a taxi driver, a street dweller or an office worker.   They may even be dressed in over-priced suits, drive luxury cars and live in opulent houses. They simply look like everybody else so you can’t identify them on sight.

Aswangs nowadays no longer sap and suck up your blood what they simply want is either: your hard-earned money, your livelihood or your reputation.

Makahulugang Biyernes Santo sa ating lahat…

The Word of the Day is… Hongsaya

Hongsaya is the modern way of writing a Filipino phrase ‘ang saya’ meaning “it’s so fun”.  This is the usual way today’s youth would write their feelings of elation towards a certain situation, event or happening.

It is from the Filipino root word ‘saya’ meaning fun with an inflectional affix ‘hong’ to express a grammatical mood. ‘Hong’ on the other hand is a modern derivative of the Tagalog article ‘ang’ meaning ‘the’.  It is spoken in a loud yet low toned voice similar to Santa’s “Ho! Ho! Ho!” in which the intonation of the last syllable is uttered similar to that of shouting or howling.

This fresh contemporary and up-to-the-minute word can be transformed into a word-compounding process that would imply greater expression of not just simple fun but high degree of elation. You could write or say in a loud yet low toned voice: Hongsaya-saya!!!

Some examples of this modern prevailing word when used in a statement could be as follows:

  • Hongsaya-saya… parang magjowa lang!
  • Grabe, hongsaya aylavet!
  • Haler… Hongsaya-saya diba?

Wala nanaman akong magawa.  Sensya na…