Idiotic Anti-RH Bill Supporter

Piolo Pascual (Negkoy's favorite)

Dear Legions of Anti-RH Bill Citizens of the Land,

I am with you.  I am writing you this letter to express my full support on your advocacy that the enactment of “Responsible Parenthood, Reproductive Health and Population and Development Act of 2011” otherwise known as RH Bill into law here in the Philippines should not be carried out.

After reading the whole content of the proposed bill, I realized that the guidelines will somehow control and slow down the growth of the country’s population.  The country is already densely populated and I’m sure you still want full increase in its inhabitants.

If this bill is passed into law, it will educate the populace about their choices on how to have the right number of people either via natural proper spacing of childbirth in the family or via contraception which will eventually slows down the great escalation of population

If population growth slows down, there will be fewer people to share on the already depleted natural resources of this country.  Of course, we don’t want that to happen, we hate natural resources!

If population growth slows down, it will result to planting of more trees at the available spaces of the land instead of building concrete residential subdivisions or squatter areas inhabited by the poor citizens of this country.  We want a concrete filthy jungle not a lush green environment.  Of course we don’t want that to happen, we hate trees!

If population growth slows down, it will result to lesser number of students per classroom.  Lesser number students per classroom will mean more focused learnings among the youth.  Lesser number of students in the classroom will discourage cheating among students during exams.  Of course we don’t want that to happen, we hate being too focused and being too intelligent!

If population growth slows down, it will result to lesser number of people queuing at the not so reliable MRT and LRT train stations.  Also, during the congested train ride, we want our faces digging into the stinky armpits of other passengers.  Thus, there will be lesser stink of body sweat in the metro.  Of course we don’t want that to happen, we love the asim smell of pawis!

If population growth slows down, it will result to lesser number of church goers and eventually lead to decreased monetary donations and stipend for our loving priests.  Even if the priests themselves do not procreate and the number one violator of their teaching that people should go forth and multiply, we exalt them.  Of course we don’t want that to happen, we so love the filthy rich priests of this land!

If population growth slows down, it will result to lesser number of Facebook users which will eventually lead to lesser number of Facebook connected friends. Of course we don’t want that to happen, we love Facebook!

Your Friend in Disaster,

Neil

Ayaw ko ng RH Bill na ‘yan kasi BALIW ako!

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